I was finding a topic to write this week. I was looking for inspiration on Pinterest when one of the posts read – share experience of the biggest challenge you ever faced.
This got me thinking. I thought of this as a good opportunity to actually know myself. To find out what is the biggest challenge I ever faced…
The toughest trek I ever did, the toughest person I ever met? What could be it? I dwelled in my entire twenty three years on this planet to find out what could be my biggest challenge…
‘life is chaos, I don’t know what to do’ read one of the journal entries of 2017, the year I graduated. According to my journal entries, the phase from after graduation to the job I got this January has been the toughest one…
I like clarity of everything. I can’t take in incomplete conversations, even that kills me. Leave alone dealing phase of only chaos. A phase of finding my true calling. Finding what is it that I wish to earn off.
However, by the end of last year, the journal entries sort of got clearer. And now when I look back I feel, this is normal. Everyone gets hit by life after graduation. This can’t be the biggest, there has to be something more that I have dealt with…
‘you write every week. you travel regularly’ said a friend when I asked what is the toughest thing I do. My body and mind have got used to it. Yes it is something I have been doing for almost two years now, I don’t deny that it is challenging, but no, there has to be something more tough that I have faced…
‘you are too critical of yourself, don’t be’ a senior at office gave this feedback recently. I read this in my journal and I was like, this is it. This is my biggest challenge – me!
I am extremely harsh on myself. Each week I am climbing a mountain and it gets tough, I tell myself that I am proving my lask week’s self that I am only getting better. That not just this mountain but there are many more I’ll climb. I just have to outgrow my previous trek physically to feel good. If not, the trek, the day somewhere feels incomplete.
Each week I sit down to write a topic, it occurs to me constantly that, is it good enough? Is this post you? Are you maintaining quality still? or is this post going to get my years of writing down? I am not an easy person to satisfy, especially with my own words.
It is indeed that I am my own biggest challenge. I am tough on me and this has been so for years. I can’t let go of this strict teacher in me. I just have to be the best of me at everything that I do. Be it anything, personal, professional, social, doesn’t matter. If I am not doing my best, its not good enough.
I don’t know why I am so but I wish to deal with it before it kills me. I went online and read about ways to deal with self criticism. I figured that one of the solutions was to journal regularly to fine tune and chanel my thoughts.
This is true. Extremely helpful. I wasn’t journaling a week due to lack of time but this one day during last week I took the pen and paper and wrote my heart out. It helped get my focus back on important things. Journaling definitely is way to heal self criticism. It gives a sense of positive way forward.
Something that also happens through journaling is that there is much more of self acceptance. When all thoughts are out there on paper it gets more clear to accept it. Criticism of self occurs from the core of improving self and it doesn’t consider accepting oneself as is. There has to be a good balance of self improvment and self acceptance for a good mental health.
When I journal regularly, it helps me accept myself and situations better. Gives a clearer picture of things I can improve and things that are too ground rooted to change.
All this above is my story of the biggest challenge I face and ways I can deal with it. Let me know your views on this one @nisha_navgire on Insta!