‘I hate things incomplete!’ I exclaimed.
Sanish replied something to this but it didn’t reach my ears, they were shut. That’s the power of angst. And leaving something incomplete is one of the topmost things that can make me upset, annoyed and every other similar word all at once!
This weekend I left a fort unconquered for reasons I don’t wish to blabber here. This makes the count to four, of the forts I have done halfway, and it kills me. The last thing I want as part of this year is to increase this number.
I came home, wrote my usual journal entry, prepared everything for the week and sat down to write this week’s blog. As I began all the angst came back to me. But I thought further and asked myself, do I travel to never leave something incomplete? Why do I travel?
This reminded me I had blogged something on the lines of why I travel and in hope of calming down I decided to read my post. All my answers were in it. I did calm down. For the first time ever I was my own healer!
The root cause of why I travel was to escape my usual routine which changed over the years. But I figured this week’s trip was a beautiful escape from my new work routine. I love what I do but to let go of everything about the week and relaxing my way felt amazing.
Having said that, work thoughts didn’t completely leave me. They kept coming back to me from time to time. I would shake it off, get myself immersed in the current moment. This repeated a few times during this trip. I’ll try my best to avoid this cycle next time.
One major thing that I do on trips is to have fun and make everyone have fun too! I believe we all have our weekday lives and we all deserve our weekend joy time. And what a blast we had. Six of us only but the madness was high.
We completed one small fort called Birwadi. The next one planned couldn’t be done. I was upset and it was obvious to all who know me well. But I didn’t express exact emotions. I kept calm and managed to laugh through the anger. It didn’t hinder the fun time.
There was not a single low moment if I keep my angst apart. It was a joyous time overall. I met a fellow trekker after months. Saw Sanish drink a bit first time on a trek, got laughed at, laughed at others and like always, felt home!
Over the years of travelling, I begin to connect to nature on different levels. I get answers and find peace within when I am out. This is why travel has become important to me now. And this weekend there were so many different elements of nature I witnessed.
I held a chick in my hand after long. I pet a calf for the first time ever. Both had eyes that melt me like ice. A little puppy walked with me a set of steps which I was to walk alone. As if this puppy wished for me to never be alone. It quietly walked with me, stopped when I did, walked at my pace. I owe my little tear of joy of the day to him.
But there were times I was pricked too, quite literally by thorns and cacti while we were searching our way to top of the second fort. I get cuts and it is normal while one walks in the wild but this time it felt as if the mountain I tried to climb tried its best to keep me away.
I saw a healthy family of langoors as they ate fruits together, perhaps their breakfast. On the other hand I even saw some monkeys scavenging food on road on the Pen-Panvel route. What a contrast life of both wild creatures I saw in a day!
A beautiful mountain covered completely from below in the fog looked as if the mountain had draped itself in a white skirt. I could see it for quite some time, I even saw its reflection for a bit and it was all so mesmerizing!
On the way back I saw three mountains being cut for various reasons, I even saw one completely burning for cultivation perhaps. The sorrow of not climbing the mountain planned was nothing compared to see the one burning and the others being cut.
I wonder what the future beholds but witnessing such things makes me tell myself to travel and watch everything I can before the species I belong to bring it all down!
Observing and picking up things comes naturally to me now as writing weekly has become a discipline. On this trip, I observed yet again how my people behave during a crisis. There are ones who work towards the solution, there are ones who keep the morale going.
It was as if quite clear to the rest five what they were doing during the crisis. I wasn’t an inch worried. The sorrow and everything else struck me later, at that moment I still was relaxed and having fun. I wonder how each functions the way they do in a crisis but it is something I am proud of and try to imbibe surely.
Like I do from each trip, even this trip gave me an immense amount of learnings as penned above. Amongst all, my favourite would be that this trip helped me seek help from me. My words helped me and I think there is nothing more a writer like me can ever ask for!
@nisha_navgire on Insta is where I am for any further idea sharing!